Worst English sentences ever

[Jolina]

what are the worst English sentences or texts you've ever read or heard (mine doesn'd count)?
When you now something please feel to quote it here so we have something to laugh about (other than my English skills of course).

 

[centurian]

The worst sentence I've ever heard is from my bank manager...

'You're overdrawn'

 

[mrxicq]

in my spanish holidays (last year):

"can you jürgen klinsmann??"

---> "do you know ...??"

 

[batisT]

"all your base are belong to us"
All your base are belong to us - Wikipedia

what else?

 

[PowMaxor]

"i am heavy on the woodway"---"ich bin auf dem Holzweg" und
"equel goes it loose"----"gleich gehts los"

beide Zitate sind von Heinrich Lübke der nich soo gut Englisch sprach und deswegen alles 1 zu 1 übersetzte

 

[RobbyLee]

"When he [the teacher] came in the classroom, everybody was excited"

 

[Pong]

Just an "had" attack but correct.

Tony, where Fred had had "had had", had had "had". "had had" had had the landlord's approval.

cheers,
Pong

This was an original sentence during a lesson.

When I drive than drive I. (Wenn ich fahre dann fahre ich.)

 

[boneheader19]

hat mir ein freund über seinen ehemaligen klassenkollegen erzählt der die tollen sätze produziert hat....

"i am in the picture now"

"it`s me sausage" >> is ma wurscht bzw. es ist mir egal

 

[gisberthannes]

Nicht zu verachten is der

Circle Run Breakdown

oder Kreislaufzusammenbruch

 

[MisterX]

someone wanted to say : Ein weißer Mann möchte gerne eine Schwarze Frau bekommen. >> White man wants to get a black woman ...

he said : White man will bekome a black woman >> Weißer mann wird eine schwarze frau werden

lol

 

[Limette]

I've heard (and read) a lot of such things:

"I bring you round the corner" [Ich bringe dich um die Ecke]
"May I become a beefsteak?" [Kann ich ein Beefsteak bekommen?]
"How goes it you?" [wie geht es Ihnen?]
"Death-sure" [Todsicher]

Yeah, sure, i think American ist much better then Britisch! We musst learn in the School AE thats ist naturaller then BE, i dont know! Its Better!

Sry for my Englisch, im cant it not very well!! xD


oaz

 

[Jusher]

Here's mine:

We arrived tomorrow! --> Wir sind morgen angekommen!

Kurz und knacking Hat mein Vater in England mal zu nem Kirschenverkäufer gesagt einen Tag nachdem wir angekommen waren

 

[Broken Sword]

"It gives so big apples."
...
...
The fool who was talking... was me... 3 years ago... -.-

 

[Astrobenno]

Meine Nichte hatte mal den Satz

"I will become a doll ..." wollte aber sagen "I will get a doll ..."

 

[RamsesV]

"My mother was burn in Innsbruck"

It was me. I wanted to tell my English teachr, where my mom's born.

Lg
RamsesV

 

[Zerd]

My favorite sentence:
"I make myself nothing me, nothing you out of the dust"
in german:
"Ich mach mich mirnichts dirnichts aus dem Staub"

This one is also very nice:
"My dear Mr. singing-club!"
in german:
"Mein lieber Herr-Gesangsverein!!"

Its always nice to translate german sayings word by word into english

Cheers Zerd

 

[reaper21]

you can say you to me (von helmut kohl glaub ich)
(er wollte jemandem das du anbieten)

 

[zanator]

since I'm in China right now, I get to read a lot of hilarious sentences.

like: with breeding in mind, you will be happy all the time

or: enjoy clambake! if friends feeling pleasure together gather we can spend time of the best

advertisement for a special tea: this tea will regulate you orgasm
(actually they ment organism)

I'm not saying my English is perfect, but I just adore "chinglish"

 

[m4m203]

First of all, there was a funny sentence in my english lesson last year.
Of course the well known mistake: it gives instead of there is/are..
It sounds too funny
And the "will/want" mistake..
"I will a tea" or "I will something to smoke."
Thats too funny, I always needed to laugh and everybody looks at me like "so where is the problem?"
Then I said, aha er wird also etwas zu rauchen/ein Tee..
It's too awesome

 

[Grindy]

the funniest english sentence i've ever heard isn't really a sentence but more a phrase, and it's barely english at all, although it was meant to be
I heard it while skiing...
"schussing down the pist"

 

[eXacT]

my friend, we played an ego shooter!!

"sry, i was be flashed!"

"pls kick the idle männers"

 

[G00dKn1ght]

original sentence! english lesson in german school (not my class):

"Last year, we dangered to italy!" (Letztes Jahr, sind wir nach Italien "Gefahren"!

mfg G00dKn1ght

 

[$.A.D.]

Franch Guy in Host Family wants to say "I'm so thirsty"->

"I'm so dirty!"
so far
$.A.D.

 

[lovevoltage]

"You have but whole nice to have dirt on the stick"

Du hast aber ganz schön Dreck am stecken.

CORRECT: (to) have a skeleton in the cupboard

 

[lovevoltage]

"Trowlner, could me become a steak"